Engage, enact ethically. Then end the interaction and allow for emergence of the next step. This is the final step in Joan Halifax’s G.R.A.C.E. method. And it’s all about closure.
no more tears to shed
This last step has two parts and here is a short description of the two parts of “Engage”:
Part 1: Engage and enact. Compassionate action emerges from the sense of openness, connectedness, and discernment you have created. This action might be a recommendation, an open question about values, or a proposal for how to spend the remaining time with this person. You co-create with the other person a dynamic, morally grounded situation, characterized by mutuality, trust, and consistent with your values and ethics; you draw on your expertise, intuition, and insight, and you look for common ground consistent with your values and supportive of mutual integrity. What emerges is principled compassion: mutual, respectful of all persons involved, and as well practical and actionable.
Part 2: End the interaction. Mark the end of the interaction with this person; release, let go, breathe out. Explicitly recognize internally when the encounter is over, so that you can move cleanly to the next interaction or task; this recognition can be marked by attention to your out-breath. While the next step might be more than you expected would be possible or disappointingly small, notice that, acknowledge what transpired. Without acknowledgement of what unfolded, it will be difficult to let go of this encounter and move on.
We live in a time when science is validating what humans have known throughout the ages: that compassion is not a luxury; it is a necessity for our well-being, resilience, and survival. My hope is that the G.R.A.C.E. model will help you to actualize compassion in your own life and that the impact of this will ripple out to benefit the people with whom you interact each day as well as countless others.
This is were it is all about … compassion … Right now to me this feeling of compassion is only what I feel in my work as an oncology nurse, but that compassion I don’t have towards/with the managers of our unit and hospital. The only thing they see is money … the people on the floor, nurses and doctors are there just to bring money into the pocket.
Of course I have a unit-head, a nice one I would say, but she is the mediator between the people on the floor and the management … for sure not my job. I feel compassion with her, she just acts how she has been instructed by her boss.
through tears a smile breaks through
a joyful day
This Haiku Shuukan episode is NOW OPEN for your submissions and will remain open until July 2nd at noon (CET).